Our (so-called) "employer"

Our (so-called) "employer"

Saturday, July 14, 2007

by Willie & Bianca

Ho boy. Little did we know when we seized the Mac yesterday (Coup de Fur! Carpe de Mac!) how confused we would get trying to post our own comments without using the Mosaic Lady's link and stuff but we're gonna figure it out. Eventually. And now we're probably totally fuxxing up the WCB protocol. We're old. Please indulge us?

Sadie's been nagging us since yesterday morning to move her WCB 5th Gotmeversary post over to this blog so she can hog even more of the spotlight and suck even more of the oxygen out of the room today. Whatever. We're gonna do it this once since she does go on and on and on about her story, and occasionally refers to US. We suppose in the interest of maintaining some sort of cohesive continuity and historical archive to our fur family chronicles here on our CATS ONLY BLOG it's a legitimate request. Plus, she has the most atrociously annoying, pathetic, irritating, screamy-whiney-voice you've ever heard when she wants something. Like her morning dollop of cream.

Here's her post. You may want to go use your litter box first. It's wordy:

Hi Everyone! Thanks for letting me celebrate my 5th Gotmeversary with all of you! We are so happy that we discovered you and will play in the cat blog box every weekend. There are so many beautiful, smart, stylish and FUNNY blogging cats around here! Go visit many of them all rounded up in one place at Dragonheart's blog. Dragonheart is this weekend's cat herding host and has something very special to celebrate too! Because it's such a cool week for me, I want to share my happy story with you.

Five years ago right now when I was not more than six weeks old, I was so over the feral life that I was enduring in the cat commune down by the San Juan River in Pagosa Springs, CO. Of course that was not the life I was born to live, but I knew I had to start life there so my destiny could intersect my Mom's. She was working at a liquor store back then (glug glug) and I knew that on this very day she'd stay a little late to help a group of wild women assemble a mixed case of wine. (My Mom knows a LOT about wine. Practice makes purrfect!) She left work later than usual that day. I executed my plan to perfection, dashing in front of her car like a darting furball flash of lightning as she drove through the alley. A confluence of graces! Mom threw the car in neutral, put on the emergency brake, and was on her feet running to catch me before she even realized what was happening. She knows a kitten in need in her sleep, my Mom, even one traveling at super sonic speed. It took her two tries to reach down into the bush where I was pretending to hide to GOTME. She was surprised that I didn't keep running. I tried to keep up the wild, resistant, feral kitten pretense, but I caved in quickly, allowing her to snag me. I sat on her lap the whole way home, trying to keep up the resistant feral pretense, but I never moved from her lap.

The Angels in Charge of Cat Distribution and Dispensation (ACCDD) sent me to her because:

1) She and my fur siblings had just been through a very scary foreclosure and nothing brings joy and cheer and hope to a life more than a kitten.
2) I look just like Gracie, the founding feline member of our current tribe, who came to Mom in 1991 and left in 2000 due to hyperthyroidism and heart disease. Some say I am Gracie returned.
3) My mom is very patient with feral kittens. She is not very patient with humans, which is kind of funny. (Unless you're a human she is not being patient with. Then not so funny.)
4) My mom is a tiny bit obsessive compulsive and prefers an even number of cats, perfectly balanced between male and female.
5) There is no 5. She has a teeny number fetish and insists that I keep this even.

So, on that fateful day in July of 2002, Mom took me home to the funky, dark, bug-infested, stinky, skanky, slanty-floored, freezing cold, ancient farmhouse my family was renting and immediately gave me a bowl of cream. I was so dehydrated and starving, I sucked it up in seconds. Then I got big diarrhea. I shat all over my behind and promptly got my first, (and only), bath. To this day I insist upon my dollop of cream every morning as she stumbles for her first cup of coffee. (Unrelenting screaming is very effective with Mom.) I spent the next several weeks living under a bed in a guest room. My dawg, Leah, and my big brother, Walter, kept close to me. Leah laid next to the bed all that time, keeping a very close eye on me. I love my dog. Walter taught me how to play when I eventually got brave enough to come out from under the bed. I loved my Walter. He went to Fur Heaven very suddenly two months ago. You can see lots of photos of him on this blog, including a very wonderful Snapfish collage poster we just got in the mail. Losing our Tubbo Walter has been a great tragedy for all of us, most especially Mom and Leah Dawg. Walter raised Leah. That's how it is in our family...the youngest fur takes the new arrival under their loving paw.

We all moved from Colorado to North Carolina at the end of last year and I love my new home. I have 9 lush, forested acres to play on, but I stick close to my home. I sure miss playing outside with Walter, but there are snakes and lizards, birds and bunnies, butterflies and fireflies to play with here. We did not have fireflies in Colorado! Whatthe?? I am not allowed outside after dark so I try to grok them through the windows. Mom can't believe that the heat does not bother me outside but our new fur doctor sold us a furminator. Who knew I was all bottom coat? I try to help my Mom with her mosaic art -- that's me, advising her on a big lazy susan project on MY consulting table -- but since Walter died, she is not so creatively inspired. At least with her mosaics. She seems to want to write a lot, which is why I'm so happy we found all you eloquent cats who blog. Mom still cries almost every day about Walter and thinks her mosaic promotion blog has turned into a fur kid promotion blog. I say: the problem with that is...? I give her free mosaic consultations, talk with her more than ever, and share extra love and attention to try to fill up some of the emptiness in her heart. We all know she loves us in very special and unique ways, but we also all know that Walter was extra-special and uber-unique in her life. If he were still with us, Walter would surely have his own blog today! (And he would certainly be cyber-courting Miss Lilly.)

Mom tried to help all of us after Walter died by consulting pet communicators. She started getting very interested in pet communication and pet reincarnation and did a lot of reading and researching. She had sessions with three women: Leonora to talk to Walter, Lydia Hiby to help Leah, and Cindy Smith for the whole family. That's where I got to talk. I told Cindy Smith to remind my Mom that I am very independent and also very content and happy with both my life and my place in the family. This was a great comfort to my Mom, and she knows it is Truth. Cindy also told my Mom that I would LOVE a new kitten. More Truth. Because I am the youngest, the new kitten will be mine!!!

So the best anniversary present the ACCDDs can give me is a new kitten, hopefully Tubbo Walter returning to us! Mom believes 100% in Fur Fate -- she knows that her four-legged companions always come to her, or wait for her, without her having to look for them (Truth again). We are all keeping a vigil for our next fur family member. Nothing brings joy and cheer and hope to a life more than a kitten.

(PS: Does anyone know if Fat Eric has a girlfriend? He reminds me of my Tubbo Walter, and like my Mom, I get weak in the paws over orange guys. Especially fat, fluffy, frequently-peckish, orange guys.)


The Cat Realm said...

I will have to read your long post later on because I am a bit time pressed...
Sadie: leave those snakes alone! That´s what I and the butler and the maid tell Anastasia too. But I am afraid she just doesn´t get it...
If your humans ever figure out a way, please let us know.

Monty Q. Kat said...

I think Fat Eric is free, I haven't heard him talk about any special lady cat...

Nice to meet you! :D

Dragonheart said...

Welcome to the Cat Blogosphere! :) It is nice to meet all of you!

Parker said...

It's nice to meetcha'! Welcome to the kitty blogosphere!

Anonymous said...

I know I was just here yesterday, but I also just read Sadie's story and wanted to tell you it made me smile. Well done, Sadie! Even as a little kitten, you knew how to pick a good human to adopt!

The Meezer Gang said...

Hi, guys! It is nice to meet you! Welcome to the blogosphere!!!
Us, Meezers

Daisy said...

Nice to meet you! The mosaic in your header is pretty. I think you will have fun in the cat blogosphere. I added you to my links so I can come back and visit!

Victor Tabbycat said...

Happy Gotchaday, Sadie! Um, Fat Eric at least used to haf a fur-furiend Athena, but she didn't haf a blog. Last I heard, they were still an item. Some cats haf more than one boyfuriend or girlfuriend, so it wouldn't hurt to check.

The Meezers said...

Hi Guys!!! we is furry happy to meet you!!!! Fanks for coming to visit.

Monty Q. Kat said...

Hello again!

MomBean wants to know if you really did want to adopt the sock kitty just in case someone else asks.

(And she's still not used to others liken' them-usually she gives them to her kidBeans...)

Zippy, Sadie and Speedy said...

Hi ::waves paws:: Welcome! Yoor gonna like it here in da blogosphere...all da kitties and woofies here are furry nice. Oh boy, we love making new frends!

Skeezix the Cat said...

Hey, yoo had a qweschun abowt how to make yer pikcher show up with yer comments win yoo leeve comments on other cat blogs.... I'll have sumthing up at the Cat Blog Help Center soon, but in the meentime, heer's the qwik and derty anser to yer problim:

Ferst, set up a free emale adress (at yahoo, gmale, hotmale, whutever) for eech of the blogging cats (or a singul emale adress for evrybuddy - persunnully, I don't like to be lumpt together with evrybuddy, so I have my own).

Secund, frum yer blogger dashbord, klik the "Settings" link next to the Mosaic Cats blog.

Third, klik the "Permissions" link wich is under the Settings tab -- the last link on the rite.

Forth, klik the bloo "ADD AUTHORS" buttun.

Fifth, tipe in the emale adresses of eech of the cats and klik the oranje INVITE buttun.

Sixth, Go to the cats' emales, and aksept the invitayshun frum Blogger (it mite be in the bulk emale folder). Klik the link in the emale to aksept the invitayshun and follow the instrukshuns to set up a blogger akkownt. Yoo can set up eech cat's profile with his or her own foto and profile deskripshun.

This will add eech cat as a contribyooter to the Mosaic Cats blog and yer individual fotos will appeer win yoo leeve comments.

Hope that helps,
Skeezix the Cat

Donny and Marie and Casey said...

Hi everykitty! It's pawesome to meet ya! We are tickled that you have your own blog! Like Karl, we are gonna have to read your post a bit later too, coz mommy is just letting us check in...we will read it later tonite!

Christine and FAZ said...

Laura a long story with a happy ending. Glad to know it all ended so well. Nice to meet you all. FAZ

Beau Beau & Angie said...

We read some of yur blog and Mom is still reeeling from dat awsome cat mosaic.

Peach Man said...

Hey guys! What a great story that is. I'm 5 too. Waddya know? Nice to meet you. Come check us out over at the Peach Pit!
Peach (also from the nutty old girls, Simone and Scout)

Tyler said...

Sadie, you are such a beautiful girl. I love your poofiness!

sammawow-china cat-willow said...

Welcome to the Cat Blogosphere. Those are lovely pictures of Sadie for her 5th Gotmeversary - congratulations to you, Sadie. We enjoyed learning about all of you - we're looking forward to lots more pictures, Willie and Bianca. You look stunning with your floofy black and whiteness!

Purrrrrs, China Cat & Willow

Grr, Midnight & Cocoa said...

Oh my goodness! Our Lady is a fluffaholic and she's really really really wanting to cuddle you!